Just a thought,
do I want to live in this world?
from here to there
and the in-between

as shadowleaves 
fill these walls inside 
this old homestead
pouring in the new day’s light
and it’s dark reflections

only momentarily 
existing in the betweenness ~
somewhere 
between the world and me 
separate

this invisible pain
stands firm 
strong and resolute 
anchored in concrete 

as it’s many roads travel directly to me
finding every place unraveled

yet, it is here 
a constant
even though mostly
hidden from view
like a glacier 
only seen on top 
of an ocean’s bow

I carry this pain ~

as it becomes 
part of who I am
this rising tide 
sometimes held at bay

in check, 
moored along the shores
where it still lives

while I desperately 
plead for a respite
where I can travel 
far away

living with pain 
as an unwelcome house guest 
a guest who wants to stay
and refuses to go

I find myself halted and separated from this world
I’m asking myself, do I?

and the answer for today,
at this moment 
for now, truly
I can say . . .

“Yes, I choose life!”

I am alive
I know love
I know joy

I’m committed 
to change the game 
finding how to move on
in this pain